The Gift of Saying “Thank You”

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My family is fortunate to have a small-town school district with a forward-thinking superintendent and caring, professional educators and support staff. Our district’s budget is not only consistently in the black, but is known statewide as one of the finest in terms of accommodating children on the autism spectrum (including one of our boys). And while there are many families hovering near the poverty line in our little town, I’ve seen administrators and staff members take their own personal time and money to ensure that their students have boots in winter or can attend a field trip with the rest of the class.

My kids are getting a fine education and I am deeply grateful for this. During the holidays, I express that gratitude with handwritten notes or cards telling the teachers how much our family values their hard work and dedication to our kids.

In recent years I’ve noticed a trend toward giving gift cards, cash, or extravagant holiday gifts to offset what teachers spend on their classrooms throughout the year. However, many parents I know donate time, classroom and party supplies, and support fundraisers throughout the year, and many teachers earn decent (though seldom extravagant) salaries with great benefits and pensions. Some districts have even banned parents from giving gifts to teachers to prevent undue influence and/or to spare families on tight budgets from feeling bad for not being able to contribute.

Truthfully, our family would love nothing more than to shower everyone in our world with gift cards from our awesome indie book store or some handmade loveliness from the talented peeps on Etsy.com. But for various reasons, including our family’s annual cash-only holiday budget, we don’t.

Instead, we say thank you.

This year, my plan is to bake some mini pumpkin loaves and make photo cards with personal notes to my kids’ teachers and some other staffers.

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Wait! Come back!

Don’t panic about the handmade gift ideas; this is not about being the parent who can out-Martha all the others, just as it’s not about being the parent who can spread the most gift cards around. Holiday giving shouldn’t be about running yourself ragged, stretching your family’s budget, or worse–going into debt in order to keep up with those spendy Joneses. The bottom line: don’t make obligatory or competitive gifting part your holiday grab bag. If you have the means to shower everyone with gift cards, great. But if you don’t, know that it’s possible to honor the spirit of this season with a heartfelt thanks.

I mentioned the “to gift or not to gift” issue to my friend, Kelly, who teaches third grade. She wrote:

I know that a note of appreciation for the job they are doing and the impact they are having on your kid means SO much more than ANY gift. I have a drawer filled with notes I have saved. When I am having a rough day in the class … nothing is better than pulling one of them out and reminding myself why I do what I do. I have no idea what gift was given to me by what family last year. Don’t spend your money… take the time and write a note!

What do you think? Share your thoughts and ideas for meaningful ways to give thanks to our educators and others in our communities.

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